Mistress Mona Dair

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    BDSM 101: Triggers and Role-play

    Triggers were created in our minds and hearts when we were young and openly receptive and malleable to the influences of the world.
    This is what most fetishes are, triggers formed when we were open to random influence. It could be anything:
    Your mum taking you to the theatre and being just tall enough to see over the stage, right at the level of the dancers’ feet -clad in bright red high heels as the dresses moved up and down their legs- created the foot fetish you now have as an adult. Wetting yourself outside of a locked bathroom door while a group of girls noticed and laughed at you when you were 5 is why once you hit puberty you felt a sexual charge at the thought of being humiliated by girls. Etc, Etc.

    I take on the roles of the mother taking her little boy across her knee, the teacher reprimanding the student in front of class, the school-girl humiliating and black-mailing the naughty panty thief. By taking on these roles, I allow my servants to fully embody the energy the felt when their unique triggers were first formed. The amount of satisfaction and release my servants and myself feel as we open up these knots of sexual tension is profound. Many of my servants will get extreme satisfaction out of this type of role-play for as many as 10 sessions, and then almost overnight, they are released from that particular sexual charge and are ready to explore something else -potentially even deeper aspects of their psyches.

     

    Triggers can be employed in more subtle play, as well. If I ever see Quentin Tarrantino in a bar, I will casually move so that my feet are in view, and then slowly start popping my heel in and out of one shoe. If I'm wearing flats, I'll scrunch my toes, and rub the soles of the shoes together feigning soreness. If I'm wearing flip flops, ill play with the toe ring on one foot with the big toe of the other. Dollars to donuts I'll have his attention. Why Tarrantino? Watch ANY of his films and you will see the evidence of a man with a healthy foot fetish.

    If I know one of my partners has a forced feminization fetish, I'll slip a pair of panties into his pocket without his noticing. Then at some point in the evening, I'll finger his pocket, pull just a hint of silky colour out and offer him a shocked expression. Job done. Immediate arousal.

    If your partner has a pet-embodiment fetish (my most commonly requested session), when you are at the grocery store with him, at some point pull him to you by his shirt collar with a small motion, and instruct him to get a can of dog food. Tell him if he isn't a very good boy, you will make him eat it for his dinner -off if your shoe. Then walk off and continue with your shopping, giving him a knowing look if he ventures to disagree with you or fails to push the cart fast enough. This may seem odd and a bit extreme game for "subtle" play, but the idea is you can play it quietly and still initiate a powerful response.

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